Pegging Out the Wash

There was a time in my life when I was a stay-at-home mom. At times, that is a hard role to fulfill. You are at the beck and call of little ones and they can be demanding. But, there is also joy in that role. Much joy. One of the things I liked best about that time in my life, was staying home. Now I work outside of the home. I enjoy my job and believe I am good at what I do. I find myself cranky if I go too many days without a day at home. Which in some ways is funny since I enjoy travel, seeing new places and meeting new people. Today is Saturday. And I am at home. All day. Mostly alone. It is blissful. I have recently finished my second cup of tea and next on my list, pegging out the wash.

So, I must say that I am extremely happy that this weekend has come, and I sit with some angst that I must endure a couple more hours before I can indulge in my NO TALKING weekend. Oh the glories. Don't get me wrong, I love people. I do. But more and more frequently,  I want to say...'no more words, please'. I am a little miffed to be labeled an extrovert especially at these times. I believe with all my heart that God has blessed me with a wonderful gift to talk to people, to connect, to make a friend in the grocery store, bakery, post office, on the street. Yet, the daily talk that I want to experience inside my own abode is very little. I am older. I have lived with a husband and small children, small and growing children, alone, with a boyfriend, and now with a roommate. In that list, there were a few blessed people to whom I could say, 'let's just sit, and not talk'. Those that love me best, read my silence not as an invitation to speak, but just to...

So, I saw someone on Saturday who has wounded me. I thought, it has been almost 6 months and feel so much more in control. The interaction was pleasant enough, but the repercussions...I was unprepared. I felt sad almost immediately, but I was heading to see my loves ..boy 2 and 3. As I visited with boy 2 and 3 and their new puppy, Bruce, I felt OK, almost good. The ride home -- not so much. Sunday -- not so much. The only 'prayer' I could verbalize was "Lord, it hurts." And it does. Still. I am at work as I write this and my tears are ready to fall. I wonder if wounds to the heart are like wounds to the body. This heart wound feels physically painful in my chest. (sleeping with my Bible laying on it helps) I have never had a stab wound, thankfully, but I wonder if it too would appear to be healed on the surface after 6 months. Internally, I think the healing would take longer. Two weeks ago I fell while hiking and bruised my arm badly. The bruise is gone from t...

I am not exactly sure when this thought occurred to me, but I have a limited amount of sunrises in my life. I want to enjoy as many as possible. I am so blessed to live near a place with water because how extra beautiful is the sun over the water. How lovely the unique birds I see. How amazing is nature in general. I do not want to take for granted my legs to walk me to the water's edge  nor the eyes that soak in my surroundings. I want to find pleasure in the daily things. Every day..